Dear god, I feel so very scared , scared to be me, to be gay, to go against the norms of society. I’m so tired of this fake life Please help me, I don’t want to live this way anymore.

My dearest son, joy and love of my life. I feel so sad to see you in pain. I “see you” I want you to “see” you and accept and love yourself and remove the shackles that you put on yourself. You are watched and guided my son. I will always guide you to the right path. That’s the little voice in your head, your intuition. So long have you worried about others and have forgotten to “live” . Like a 2 year old who throws caution to the wind and explores and plays without fear, I want that for you son. You looked into the eyes of Dave yesterday , the older man you met from Kijiji and you felt instant attraction and you were scared of it. This has been going on for over 12 years son, it’s been too long ever since you felt attraction for Perry on that toronto street.

It’s time my son, it’s time to trust me and follow your heart. The world is going to move on with or without you. No one person stops the world or life from moving on. I love you my dear boy, it’s time to love yourself.