Dear God, why is it so hard to find you. Where are you and why do i struggle so much with food? is this my curse? do you want me to be lonely and wither my life away. WTF?
Dear Son of mine, oh joy oh bliss. I do not like seeing you suffer and struggle. that is not my dream for you. I also feel powerless when i see you struggle. I know the way but I do not control outcomes. I can't wave a magic wand and find you a parking spot. I just guide you to your best interest. It's a partnership my loved one. Special K, Master K, whaterver K you want to be.
You made it easy for your sister to buy you a gift for your birthday. That was kind and you are getting her a lovely gift that she loves. she loves the world of books and getting her a book and gift card is great. AS for Vash, she does so much for you but you take her for granted. Send her a bottle of wine and a gift basket and make her feel special and loved. You have a good relationship with them and when you lower your expectations for your mom, you will also have a good relationship with her, inshallah. I am really sorry my little one that you are feeling so lousy and up and down and trying so hard. listen to your heartbecause that is where i speak to you and all will be well :)
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