Dear God, thank you, thank you so so much. It hurt so much last night it was so very painful God. Please help me with life please help me stay in the moment God. Please help me heal. it's so very very hard God. I want love, sex, companionship. I feel so very deeply deprived of it. Last night I called out to Nasreen and remembered how we cuddled in bed, i miss that so much, i miss the lust.
The cravings are fucking intense God, you know. I just don't know if it will go away the loneliness and despair god and the the powerlessness, hopeless feeling. sometimes I say I want to die, please just kill me God. I don't want to feel this continuous pain every fucking night. Please give me the next right action dear God. With love, Krisen.
My dearest son of mine my joy and bliss how i love these so so much. I'm very sorry you are suffering my son. My heart bleeds and I'm god and I also feel helpless when i see you suffer my dear child.. So powerless to help you. let me help you son , let me guide you. that's all i can do, i don't control outcomes but I can and will guide you my dear son. Please follow my lead my boy. Place your trust in me one step, one day, one moment at a time. one foot at a time, one finger at a time one breath at a time. let go my dear son and fall into my lap. I know it's so very hard to let go and trust when you've had to work so very fucking hard to keep things together. We are here for you my boy, we will help you my boy, you are truly loved.
Rest easy my love, all will be revealed, the next right path will be shown. I love you so so very much, you are well my boy, you are well.
