Dearest sweet Krisen

Here you go my little boy. I’m so sorry my sweet boy. It’s going to be okay. I’m sorry you had those urges to buy and I hope it works out that you don’t have to deal with the return of the one you bought today. I know you’re excited about the MacBook Air. And I’m really sorry that you even bought that. I hope that you can return it, if you don’t feel good about it and like you’re spiritually aligned with it dear One.

Dear one, I know you feel intense fear about the meeting tomorrow and today you just want to binge and that’s okay. I love you as you are my dear sweet boy. It’s a ok. Please breathe. You did great today by reaching out to David and lady in OA Dublin and talking to chatGPT.

I’m sorry it’s so hard, I’m proud of you for making it here, even though you didn’t want to come, I’m proud of you for taking your medication, I’m proud of you for doing the meditation, and for the workout and for for making the breakfast and the smoothie shake. I’m so proud of you little one. I’m so proud of you little one, for switching the speakers and for getting rid of the ps4 and monitor, it’s okay little one. You are okay to do whatever you want little one, whatever makes you and lil k and big K and the critic and the parents and all the parts of you my sweet boy, I am so very glad you showed up my love. You are going to be so very okay. I’m okay my little one, and I truly love you with all my heart. Where is Marc tanous? I just don’t feel like waiting today. God I need some help please. I’m so bored and tired.

There’s this attractive girl, she’s so cute with her nail polish. I feel so inadequate. I’m such a girly man. It hurts me so much. I’m glad I knew Alecias name. It’s such a good trick.

I had bad sleep last night. God I just want to fuck, I just want to get over this fucking drought period. It’s okay to be attracted to who I am. It’s okay dear Krisen. I just want you to shine that love on yourself. You’re a beautiful boy, a beautiful man. And I love you so very much. It’s going to be okay little one. It’s going to be okay.

 

I’m listening to the trauma workbook.

Memory loss from Trauma

Stuffing down our feelings.

The trauma is not our fault. I guess I’m getting to know about myself.

Pretend it didn’t happen. 1