things are hard..coping

Earning is a problem. Not making enough to support myself and 11k plus in the line for credit debt. It sneaks up so quickly. Am willing to do some part time jobs while I build up my tolerance. I don't want to get into a job and then get into the binge cycle. I hope that I keep pushing myself enough. I can't get into catastrophic thinking and I need a plan and trust and stick to it thay keeps me moving forward. 

Today it's a study off French practice for our week off. Put erez directly in touch with bill.so that's another revenue stream loss. Part of me is giving up IT so I can look at myself honestly. It's a clean start but my thinkig is still the same and I need to look at a next career or a few ways to makes a living.